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Miscellaneous Jokes

(Total Poems: 15 | Viewed: 7744 times)

James Bond

On a flight James bond was sitting next to a Telugu guy.
Telugu Guy: ‘Hello, May I know your name please?’
James Bond: ‘My name is Bond’ Continuing in his inimitable
Style,…… James Bond.’
Then Bond asks: ‘And you?’

Telugu Guy:
‘My name is Rao…
Siva Rao…
Samba Siva Rao…
Venkata Samba Siva Rao…
Yarlagadda Venkata Samba Siva Rao…
Rajasekhara Yarlagadda Venkata Samba Siva Rao……..
Sitaramanjaneyula Rajasekhara Yarlagadda Venkata Samba Siva Rao…
Vijayawada Sitaramanjaneyula Rajasekhara Yarlagadda Venkata Samba Siva Rao…’

Since then when anyone asks Bond his name he simply says ‘James Bond’

Wonderful Coffee

Customer to waiter: Everyday you charge me money for a cup of coffee. It will be wonderful if you serve me coffee free of cost today.

Waiter: Sir, everyday you drink coffee from a filled cup. It will be wonderful if you drink it from an empty cup today.

Movie without sound

Friend 1: Last night i saw an English movie,it had no scenes and no sound….!!!
Friend 2 :-what is the name of the movie..????
Friend 1:-”no disc inserted”….!!!

Father’s Philosophy

A young man comes home and says “Dad, just got my driver’s license and would like to use the family car.”

Father replies, :”O.K., son. But, first, you have to get good grades in school, keep your room clean, make the yard is neat, and cut your hair. Come back in a few months and then we’ll see.”

Well, several months pass and the young man comes into the house with his report card in his hand. “Dad, I got great marks on my report card. I’ve been keeping my room as neat as a pin, and the yard is always ship-shape. How about letting me use the car?”

Father replies, “That’s all true, but son you didn’t cut your hair.”

Son says, “But, dad, Jesus had long hair.”

Father replies, “Yes, son, you’re perfectly right. And he walked everywhere he went.”

Any Gators?

While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist’s boat capsized. Although he could swim, his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the capsized craft. Finally spotting a beachcomber on the shore, he shouted out to him, “Hey, are there any ‘gators around here?”

“Nope,” the man yelled back. “Ain’t been any ‘gators ’round these parts for years!”

Feeling more at ease, the tourist commenced swimming leisurely towards shore.

When he was about halfway there, he shouted out to the beachcomber again, “How’d you get rid of the ‘gators?”

“Oh, we didn’t do nothin’,” the beachcomber yelled back. “The sharks got every last one of ‘em!”

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